This week something big happened to me…
I have been feeling so inspired by the season shift and all the holiday talk. I have been counting my lucky stars while mapping out the projects I am bringing to life this winter and know you will be excited about them too! I’ve been taking such good care of my mind and body. I picked out our holiday cards (the first we’ll be sending out as a couple!) and I got to look back on our wedding day photos that made my heart so happy. I squeezed my dog this week and have thanked him for being my weekly sidekick. I read. I slept well. Every single day this week I just felt immensely grateful for life!
This morning I was going through Instagram DMs and read a few of the nicest messages. I put my phone down, started to make my coffee, and tears welled up in my eyes. Looking back over the way I felt this week, I realized something. This is the first time in my life I’ve felt proud of myself. Growing up, I always felt a bit inadequate. Most of my life actually, and even dating several years back when my blog started to really grow, I felt like I was experiencing imposter syndrome. Constantly asking myself, what do I have to offer?
Since January when I decided to take much better care of myself –– physically, mentally, and create better/healthier lifestyle choices… that was the beginning of a transformation. Learning my process with my work has helped me get here, too. Having the most wonderful, supportive husband who wholeheartedly believes in me and is always proud of me. And another huge contributing factor is you. All in parallel, have made me feel genuinely proud of who I have become.
It was kind of a strange realization. Of course, there are things in my past that I accomplished and I might have felt proud at the moment, but this just feels so different. I feel like I’ve reached a breaking point where I am seeing myself in a new light. It’s like weight and self-doubt have been lifted and my focus is right where it should be. On the good. Taking care of myself, listening to my gut, and surrounding myself with wonderful humans has changed me.
I just wanted to write this out as I am so grateful. I am thankful for your kindness and support which has helped me to find my purpose on a deeper level. You inspire me to get to work every day. Chase my curiosities and share them. You remind me that I am doing something right and to keep going.
All these thoughts just flooded my mind and I wanted to write them down. So much love! Thank you xx