Since time has unfolded from my younger years, I’ve loved documenting pieces of my life and what inspires me.
With every new phase we go through, comes evolution and expansion—and I’ve finally stepped foot into the chapter I’ve been waiting for. Creating a beautiful life for my family.
This new mom era is all about slow-paced living, making a house a home, and cultivating daily rituals that bring inspiration, contentment, and most importantly—enjoyment.
For that’s what life is all about…
If you’ve been following along for a long time now, you’ve been with me through a lot of life changes. Moving in with Matt, bringing Scout into our lives, getting married, buying our first home, and welcoming Grace into the world.
This past year or so, if you’ve paid close attention, you might have noticed that I’ve been going through some ups and downs adjusting to a new life and a new very important role (mom). It’s been a few years of wild life events domino-ing one after another.
I decided to take a few days away from social media / my phone at end of last week. I needed some time to disconnect. I swear to you, within 24 hours, I was thinking so much more clearly! Take those necessary pauses when you need them! The last few months I have slowly sorted out a lot of things going on in my head. And by the end of this weekend, I basically got to the bottom of the remains of what has been bothering me.
When we first moved out of the city, I embraced suburbia with loving arms. I was ready to have more space and a yard! This summer the reality of our past behind us hit me hard. I felt sad not being in a busy city anymore. I felt discontentment, like I didn’t know what to do with myself. In San Francisco, I would get dressed up most days and cruise around favorite neighborhoods, enjoy park afternoons, meet friends for lunch, bring my laptop to favorite cafés, walk to date nights with Matt. We had both lived in SF for over a decade and established such a lovely life.
This weekend, it all dawned on me. I have been stuck in the identity of a San Francisco girl. I spent years discovering, growing with, and falling in love with the city that it became such a massive part of me. And so when it came to shifting to daily life in suburbia… something felt off. I was trying so hard to “feel like my old self again”… rather than realizing that this new life we chose looks a lot different. I’m a lot different!
Lately, I have been falling in love with our house all over again. I see it’s potential—and how much we’ve already done to make it look and feel incredible! I’ve been taking a closer look at our family life, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I love our laid-back routines, planning renovations, and soaking up our yard. I spent a lot of time the last few days asking myself—what do I really want for my everyday life?
I want to create a magical childhood for Grace and inspiring life for my family. I want to make our home feel like the happiest and most cheerful embrace. I want to learn and grow in new ways and spend time on hobbies I love—like gardening and cooking. I have been resisting this slow-paced life because I was comparing it to life we had before. But when I thought about it… this is the moment in time I have literally dreamt about and looked forward to since I was young. And this is the lifestyle I actually prefer for myself right now!
I feel so much liberation and excitement having reached this point of acceptance. Fond closure of the past, and beyond thrilled to look at things a bit differently—and relish in this time of life that is full of beauty and possibility.
This revelation is equally freeing with my work! I’ve been a little stuck as to my place here and direction. When you feel stuck—it just means you need change. A change in mindset, in my case.
This corner of the internet is going back to its roots. Like when it all began during those early days of city living, while starting anew. Creating a lifestyle with fresh eyes. And a nice well-rounded balance of content again, too. Life updates, home evolution, gardening, entertaining, cooking, and motherhood.
I feel like those who read my blog often have, in a sense, been on this life change rollercoaster with me. It’s kind of nice to have a community where we are all growing up together. I’m just very excited to truly welcome this new season of life. And happy to have you come along with me! x
Share this story
Happy you stepped away from social and were able to find clarity. Being a mom of two myself now, I miss the freedom I once had before being married and having kids, just like you. It really does take time and just when it feels right, something comes along or happens to make you miss it again. But over time, it happens less and less. I have to imagine it’s kind of like death. You miss that thing or person so much in the beginning and overtime, the pain of losing that thing or person doesn’t go away, but it changes. You slowly learn to reminisce about the old times and good memories and there will always be a part of you that is sad, but the sadness becomes less debilitating and less frequent. It also teaches us to be present and honor the now. In 10 years, I know I’ll look back and be missing the time happening right now and where we are. Such a good lesson to live in the present and know that it’s ok to miss your past too.
This post came at the most perfect time for me! My husband and I moved from our city to a small town four years ago and while it’s been a positive and fun adventure for the most part, it’s just hit me now that I’m craving our old life and haven’t been able to fully embrace this new chapter. It’s hard, but I’m getting there. I’m so glad you’ve found clarity and are ready to embrace this exciting chapter!
This post came at the most perfect time for me! My husband and I moved from our city to a small town four years ago and while it’s been a positive and fun adventure for the most part, it’s just hit me now that I’m craving our old life and haven’t been able to fully embrace this new chapter. It’s hard, but I’m getting there. I’m so glad you’ve found clarity and are ready to embrace this exciting chapter!
This!!!!: “This is the moment in time I have literally dreamt about and looked forward to since I was young.”
Your post today is so relatable. I struggled with this identity change for years after leaving SF (I lived their for more than a decade) and creating a life and now raising 3 kids in the suburbs. When I finally slowed down and accepted that the whimsical, spontaneous, romantic city girl within grew up and got what she always wanted, it made all the mundane, day-to-day suburban activities become joyful. This new season is so special.
I’ve been reading your blog for quite some time and I am cheering this evolution on! While I originally was drawn to the design posts, I’m now in my second trimester with my first (baby girl!) and have visited your pregnancy/postpartum posts SO many times. I look forward to seeing more motherhood/life updates from you 🙂
So beautiful, Ashley… and such a wonderful reflection reset on how you want to feel and be 💕 I appreciate the reminder on embracing the new – it’s something I’ve been experiencing in my own life lately. Thank you 🙂
Ashley this is truly so beautiful and I’m beyond happy for you and your current adventure.